Camilla's Journey Tracker

LilySlim Weight loss tickers

Tuesday 10 January 2012

Breaking Down Excuses

Well what a difference fb can make. Prior to fb, having only released this blog on the 12 WBT forums, I had 60 page views. Today as I look at the page views, I’m sitting on 265! Traffic increase by 200 – half wish I was charging for traffic – I’d be making some nice moolah by now! Only kidding – this is, and always will be a free place to visit. Thanks to all of you who take the time to read my scrawlings.

Now I try to keep my posts generally pretty upbeat with a mix of humour, but sometimes there has to be troughs to balance out the peaks. Today is one of those days. Actually, rephrase: yesterday was one of those days.

Here in Central Qld we’re going through a heat wave at 36 degrees Celsius. As my home is fully insulated and was locked up all day, the temperatures inside were closer to 40 degrees. After trying to ‘air’ the heat out, I decided to crank my air cons (one reverse cycle and one portable).

Whilst the air cons were trying to do their job I thought I’d pop down to the post office to drop off my latest eBay sale and perhaps get some fruit and vege from Woollies. I now understand why you don’t go shopping on an empty stomach. All day I had been extremely conscious of what passed my lips and was well below my calorie levels. What’s that? Four pack of Mocha Drumsticks on special? Sure, it’s hot and when it’s hot you eat icecream! I’ll have a packet. Kenilworth Dairyblend Mousse? Why not, there’s dessert? I’m not ‘officially’ on the program yet. Within seconds I had built enough excuses to justify eating anything.

Within an hour of getting home I had ‘inhaled’ roughly 1300 calories – that’s my daily recommended intake in under an hour!! I say ‘inhaled’ because I don’t really recall tasting it, I barely recall consuming it. It just sort of happened. Getting the guilts immediately afterwards as well as a sore tummy, I thought I’d get online and vent. Guess what? I wasn’t the only one having an off day. It took someone else to pull me into line and tell me not to beat myself up over it before I started feeling a little better.

I am human. I make mistakes. The difference between me now and me last year is how I choose to handle my mistakes. I can sit and cry over what has already happened but I can’t change it. Thanks to those of you who snapped me out of ‘victim mentality’ where I blame everyone else and instead into ‘survivor mentality’ where I started working on what I need to do to avoid circumstances like this again. Yes I’ll make more mistakes, what I needed to ensure is that my mistakes are smaller.

First of all, I will buy treats one by one - at least for the time being. It might be pulling on the purse strings more but I’d rather that than hanging off my waist. Also, if I have a slip up, I’m not going to go into self destruct mode, instead I will work off the calories consumed (either that day or the very day after). So today I'm pumped. Food is back on plan. Working a four hour shift tonight, so I'll be on my feet walking, cleaning and replenishing stock - this will help counteract last night.

I am already admitting to all I eat on myfitnesspal (phone app and website) so it’s not like I’m hiding it (if you want to add me my username is Camilla12WBT), I’m ready to confront this. Tomorrow is the weekly weigh in. I’m a little nervous but I took a sneak peak this morning and I see a loss on the scales. I wonder how long it will take for last night’s misjudgement to count in my weight?

2 comments:

  1. Glad you found some support! FB is great for that, so supportive and encouraging.Goodluck in the morning!!! Can't wait to hear about the proof of your efforts on the scales.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Yes it's a bit difficult when those you are close to don't really support you, I've found this has been a hurdle I've previously struggled with which is why I'm being so open and honest here. Regardless of whether people actually read this or not, it makes me feel supported just getting it out there. I'm sure once I reach goal I'll be very interested in backtracking and re-reading it too.

    ReplyDelete